The Christmas Crap Countdown: Day 12

Day 12: Squirrel Coffee Cup

All those squirrels you see outside the kitchen window when you’re sitting down with your morning cup of joe? Heads up, bub: It’s the java they smell. Screw the acorns and bird seed; what they’re really hoping is that you’ll toss some Dark Sumatra Blend their way.

With the holidays and the cold weather here, what better way to say, “Hey, furry little woodland pals, thanks for giving my day a lift” than by giving their day a little lift–with a cup of hot coffee in their own special little cups? Such a nice way to keep their strange little clawed hands warm…and those high-speed chases around the tree trunk will take on new, turbo-charged charm with a little caffeine thrown in. Get out the stopwatch—those critters are going to break a new land speed record.

This is an actual squirrel using an actual Squirrel Coffee Cup. But whether he’s actually drinking coffee or tea is anyone’s guess.

Just be sure to tell those squirrels to keep their gift on the low-down, or else you’ll have raccoons and skunks lined up at dawn outside your kitchen window to order double soy decaf mocha lattes to go.